So friends. I am going to assume by now you have had a chance to absorb and decide for yourself whether or not you like me. You know the whole truth of what I have done, and what I will continue to do. While you are here, lets continue a bit further down the primrose path. I will spare you the boring and otherwise unnecessary details of my trial.  As you already know I was found not guilty by reason of insanity and sent to Danvers for the term of my natural life. If they had only known what they were unleashing.
Life in the asylum was fairly quiet and routine. A mouthful of pills, an arm full of sedatives, and on the really exciting days.. Electro-shock treatments. I believe I told you in the beginning of our adventures together how my change started,  looking out over that beautiful lawn and suddenly feeling as though someone had punched me in the stomach. Let me detail that day for you just a little bit further.

I had been having dreams and visions for about a week. My doctor said it was the product of an unwell mind, and felt the time was right to start electro-shock treatments. He said it would help me come to terms with what I had done, and drive the sickness out of my brain.  Personally, I was opposed to the idea. From what I had seen of other patients who went through the treatment, you returned nothing more than an empty, drained, husk. I was certain my brain was just fine the way it was, after all.. I wasn’t crazy.  I knew the dreams had to be the product of something else.  I suppose it would help you get a visual if I were to explain them a bit.  In these dreams I saw great bloody battlefield.  Fields full of dead brothers, fathers, husbands. I heard wives and daughters weeping for men who would never return home, and I heard a constant drum beat in the background.  The ground was so saturated with the blood and body fluids of all those men, my feet slipped and struggled for traction.  Each step sucked at the bottom of my shoe with a great groan.  Over all of this noise I heard a voice cry out loudly

“When the Lamb opened the second seal, I heard the second living creature say, “Come!” Then another horse came out, a fiery red one. Its rider was given power to take peace from the earth and to make men slay each other. To him was given a huge sword.”

I felt like.. Rather I knew.. That they were talking about me, and it all seemed so real. I was not a horseman, and I surely did not believe in god. How could any of this be true.
I was staring out over the lawn trying to decide whether or not to go through with the treatment when you entered my story.

Lets skip ahead in time.  So now I am tied down to that silly wooden frame, sweating like a pig, vomiting all over myself.  The next thing I knew I was standing in a bright field.  The trees swayed gently in the breeze, and I could smell all the flowers around me.  I could smell the dank musk of the earth at my feet.  The sun was shining down on my face warming it.  Looking around I saw a woman, standing in the middle of the field.  She smiled and called me over with the wave of her hand.  Still unsure if it was me she wanted, I pointed to myself and looked around.   She laughed out loud and nodded her head.  I was struck by how melodic her laughter was, and how kind.  Her eyes were kind as well, and I suddenly felt deeply emotional about her.  I do not want to say that I loved her, but that is the truth.  I loved her with all my heart.

She sat down on the grass and I walked over and sat down beside her.

“Hello” I said quietly

She smiled back in return and grabbed my hands in hers.

“I need your help.  I know that you do not understand what is going on.  I also know that you do not believe in me, but I am here today to bring you to my truth.  You are my vessel, My horseman of war.  Across this land of Legends, few remember the truth.  Even Fewer obey My laws.  I need you to help them remember, bring them the truth, and My laws.  It will not be an easy path for you to follow, and I know that you have been damaged in My name, but if you do this, those whom you save, will forgive you of their deaths, and those you do not, are not worthy of Me.  Will you help me, will you become My SilentFire.”

I could only nod my head.   She smiled gently at me, and once again I knew without a doubt that I loved her.  She placed her hand on my forehead, and suddenly I understood everything.   I knew why I had suffered.  I knew that I was doing her work.

Friends, dearest blood.  I beg you, get your hearts right with the Lord.  I am Her vengeance.  Her time is at hand.  Understand that when you feel my swords point at your back I do so to save your souls.

Until we meet again

Good morning, dear friends. I trust you slept well, and my previous tale did not give you too many nightmares. I am glad to see you are back to continue the story. I am certain that pleasantries are not what you came here for, so

Slowly drying blood covered every inch of my body. I became aware of this a the same moment I heard horse hoofs on the cobblestone in front of our home. This is the one and only moment in the last 100 years I though I might be just a little bit crazy. I am not sure where I learned bible verses, but wall to wall, there they were. The entire Book of Revelations painted out in blood, along with symbols I didnt understand. Even the ceiling was covered. A strange mosiac pattern starting from the center and radiating outward in a pattern of shooting stars, crosses, crescent moons, and what appeared to be the virgin mary in the dead center. I looked back down at the floor and saw the bodies of my former parents. I could no longer recognize the body of my step- father. It was entirely gashed and torn to shreads. Rather like a pound of hamburger. My mother was not that much changed, other than the missing eye. Her expression had not changed in 7 years, and I realized with a sharp clarity that I had not in fact killed here. She had been dead for years. I just ended her suffering.
A loud knocking on the front door drew my attention,
“well no one left to answer it now but me” I thought with a glowing satisfaction.
I straightened my dress the best I could, but much to my dismay, my white stockings were spattered in several places with stains of red.
“That will never come out” I thought to myself and sighed quietly. Another loud knock and a demand to “open up” sent me scrambling dow the hall. I passed an image of myself reflected in a hallway portrait. Oh Dear, I really should have left time for a bath.

The police officer visably blanched at the sight I presented. I must have looked in shock because he recovered himself quickly and said
“Miss.. are you?” that was all he could get out before I interrupted him.
“Good evening Sir” I said in a quiet voice
“The bodies you are looking for are in my step-fathers study. please mind your uniform. I have made quite a mess in there it would seem. Blood is still dripping from the ceiling and I would hate for your to stain your uniform”
I stepped aside to allow him to pass, only then did I realize I still had the bloody screwdriver lodged firmly in my grasp. I bent down and very gently placed it on the floor in front of his partners feet.
“Oh dont worry Sir. I could not harm a fly, well at least not a decent fly” I said as non-chalantly as I could.
He just stood their staring at me and we exchanged a few moments of silence. Him in disbelieve, me in peace and contentment.
The silence was broken by a loud retching, and a very pale Officer Daily rushing from my step-fathers study and out into the street. I sat down on a chair in the hallway and watched him. He was bent over at the waist, throwing up his dinner. I had never seen anyone throw up that much. Poor man. When at last he stood up fully, he was pale and shaking. I waited a moment for him to collect himself and then went over to apologize.
“I am sorry about your dinner officer. If you would allow me I would like to pay for another” I said as I reached inside the small purse that hung off my side. His partner grabbed me roughly from behind and threw me up against the waiting carriage.
“Lock her inside. No one is going to believe this” Daily said, his voice still quivering.
That was the first of many nights I would spend “locked” in somewhere. That didnt matter anymore. I was safe, and at peace with the whole world. I lay my head down on the carriage seat for “just a moment” I told myself. I hadn’t slept so well in 7 years. it was finally over. Little did I realize it was just starting.

There is still time my friends.  Open your hearts and minds to the Lord your god.  She will redeem your black souls from the eternal fires of hell!  She is merciful

so dearest friends, where was it we last left off? ahhh yes I was telling you about mommy and daddy dearest. what a wonderful childhood. Well I suppose I should get right down to it and give you all the details. Please be warned dearest friends, this next part will be quite hard for you to stomach, and you will most likely think less of me after reading it. What is done is done. I cannot take it back, even if I wanted to. Believe me. I have no desire to take back my actions, and even 100 years laters, I still get that warm fuzzy glow when I think about it. Alas, enough poetic license, lets just get on with the show..hummm?

It was a very cold night in february, 1830. I remember thinking that the cold weather might make the pistol I carried useless, but that was a risk I was willing to take. Earlier in the day my step father had trudged off to work at the factory, and as usual mother was passed out on the couch. I spent the entire day sitting in his chair in his office.  Sometimes rocking back and forth, othertimes spinning around in circles. I was practically giddy with anticipation. I could see the blood running down the walls..painting them a vibrant shade of retribution.  In my minds eye I could see his brains spray out of the back of his head and splatter across the wall. I was going to enjoy running my hands through the warm, wet, stickiness.  Around 6 Pm I looked out the window one last time wondering in agitation where he was and noticed him walking up the road.  I jumped back, had he seen me?   With one last turn around the room, I quickly stepped inside his closet, and shut the door.  One foot firmly planted on either side of the door jam, I leaned back against the wall and cocked the pistol. I only had 1 shot and I planned to make it count. After 7 years of putting up with him rutting on top of me, now it was my turn.  I was ready.

I heard his footsteps in the hallway and the closer he got the more  I felt my blood sing and call out for revenge. I could no longer contain the pounding of my heart and was certain he would hear it through the door, but as he continued down the hall to his office, I could detect no hint of hesitation. The sound of his hand on the doorknob almost made me jump, but I steadied myself.  This was the moment I had been waiting for.  I kept repeating softly inside my head “daddy is going to love you baby girl, daddy is going to love his baby girl.”   The knob was heavy and turned slowly.  I raised my arms to be in the correct postion to blast out his left eye socket. The door opened plunging me into a halo of bright white.  I will never forget the look of complete surprise and confusion on his face in the moments before I pulled the trigger.  My aim was not as true as it should have been.  Mostly because of how excited and shaking I was, but never the less his cheek shattered open, and a spray of creamy white mixed with dark maroon sprayed out the back of his head.  It covered the wall behind him just as I had pictured it, and flowed in deep gashes down the white white wall.  I heard his body hit the floor with a hollow thud and I finally exhaled letting go of the breath I had been holding forever.   Standing there for a moment I just watched his body twitch. From somewhere in the back of my brain I heard a long loud scream and knew where it came from. The louder the scream the more it angered me.  How dare she scream for him.  He got exactly what he deserved, all in all.  Now it was her turn.  How dare she?  I reached down to the floor and picked up the first thing my hand came in contact with, a long screwdriver.

When you stick a screwdriver into human flesh, you almost expect there will be some resistance.  You prepare yourself to have to give it your all and at that moment all I could think of was shutting down that wretched noise.  I swung with all my might, hearing the screwdriver whistle as it met the air, then the soft squish of flesh and the crunch of bone.  I hadn’t even looked where I was aiming.   Later, during my trial, my lawyer would call this fact into account when mentioning to the jury that

“she had to be right mad”

The hard silver tip of the screwdriver had entered her right eye and then took an ackward angle and rammed into her brain.  Like making scrambled eggs in the shell.  I stood there again for another moment, taking in the scene.  Him laying on the ground, body askew, a gaping wound where his right cheek should be.   Her, dress snaked up around her hips, mouth open in a scream of terror.  The silence was perfect.  I dipped a hand in the blood now pooling on the ground around my feet.  It was warm, but cooling quickly.  This was what I had planned for so long.   You wont ever be loving anyone again.. will you daddy?  For a moment I had the sinking feeling that he would rise from the dead just to spite me.  In a fit of terror I grabbed the screwdriver and began hacking away at his body.    The official report would read 575 additional stab wounds post mordem, and several key body parts unaccounted for.   We will get to all that later.

Again I issue this warning my beloved friends.  Get your heart right with the lord.  Her time is at hand, and those who do not heed this warning will burn in eternal fires.

I am pleased to see you have all returned here alive. Now where were we… ahhh yes. You wanted to know how I came to be what I am. I am not at all certain wether or not you believe me at this point, but again it does not matter. For while I tell this story for your benefit, I do not require your belief in me. I think the best place to start all of this is with my birth. Buckle in ladies and gentleman.

Like the rest of you I was born to a mother and father. Neither of which were worth the space they took up on this earth. My father, if nothing else, had the decency to abandon me early, 2 months old, rather than deal with the responsibility of a family. Good for him. My mother on the other hand.. well we will come to her later. I wont bother to list all the step-fathers and boyfriends who had the unfortuante luck to meet her, but I will discuss step-father number 7. He enjoyed drinking beer, watching nascar, and raping little girls, and of course my mother couldnt be bothered to intervene. At the tender age of 7 I was introduced to “Love”, well that is what he called it anyways. Late one evening, I heard footsteps coming down the hall, and then the slight turn of my doorknob. The room was lit brilliantly for a moment, and then total blackness. I felt a weight on the edge of my bed and a hand on the small of my back rubbing in slow small circles. For a moment I thought someone had come to check on me and make sure I was ok. This struck me as very strange, because no one cared about me. I was just a person who took up space in a house that didn’t belong to them. Then someone leaned down and whispered quietly in my ear,
“Hush now little one, daddy is going to show you what love is.”, and a hand slowly slid my nightgown up. I dont recall what happened after that except alot of grunting and groaning, and on my end a bright white pain. The Doctors at Danvers said my mind was blocking it out as a way of dealing with what happened to me. I like to think of it as Gods little gift for the work I do. for 7 years this continued, every other night
“hush now, daddy is going to love his little girl”
Mother knew what was going on, but as early as I can remember my days consisted of trying to be invisable at school and cleaning up her vomit. Those were the good days. When she wasn’t quite as sober there was quite a bit of ducking and hiding from belts, shoes, books, whatever she could throw at me for some unknown crime. Once I made the mistake of asking for some money so I could go to the store to buy toilet paper. My ribs were bruised for a month. You learn to be solitary quickly in that kind of environment. Later when I was on trial I would hear phrases like “mentally incapable” and “crime of passion”. Between you and me, I knew exactly what I was doing when I put that bullet in his brain. I smile now remembering the shocked look on my mothers face as she tried to run away. A bottle of vodka and a handfull of pills make it hard to go anywhere very fast.
Well, I think that is enough for you to absorb for now.
Get your heart right friend. The time is at hand. The Lord will redeem you if you only ask

Most people dont remember they day they were born. I suppose for me born is not the correct word. I was created with 1 singular purpose. With the simplest of word or deed I will strip away your false sense of security. I will shine the bright light of heaven on you, and those like you. I will destroy your faith in yourself and in humanity. It will be a bloodbath. I am war.
Unlike my 3 “Brothers” in arms, I was once human. Technically I still am. For reasons unknown to me, God in her wisdom has chosen to trap me in this mortal form. It is a fitting punishment for taking life, however ironic. That is a story for another time. Let me briefly tell you of my life, and then we will get down to it.
I remember sitting at a window, looking out over the green grass of Danvers State Insane Asylum. It must have been April or May, because I could see flowers in bloom. I couldnt remember the last time I had smelled a flower, or felt the soft grass between my toes, and I was thinking how nice it would be to strip off that ghostly white gown and roll in the soft grass, feeling it prickle my naked body. At that exact moment, someone punched me in the gut, or at least if felt like they did,  and I doubled over screaming out in pain. Of course any infraction of the silence rule would not be tolerated, and in short order 2 sets of strong hands gripped my upper arm and a stinging pain made its way to the front of my mind. One benefit, dear friends, of being criminally insane are the drugs. Wonderful blues, reds, and whites, handed out like candy at a ticker tape parade. I loved the way they crunched between my teeth, and the slow drift into hallucination. The sedative worked quickly, and I knew they were strapping me down to the hard wooden platform in my cell. Once again I had lost the little piece of mattress I called my own. The door shut with a clank and I heard the key turn, but beyond the pain I was waiting for something, perfectly content to just lie there and be nothing.
Some people call it transformation, other epiphany. I call it my change. I would love to share with you exactly what happened, but it was over 100 years ago, and my mind is a bit fuzzy on the details. Perhaps I will seek out a bottle of absynth someday and get down to the nitty gritty with you. For now, lets just leave it with, I dwell in a human body, but I am no longer human. I was once insane, but now I see things in sharp detail. Precise. I serve the Lord God. The end is near good friends. The second seal has been broken, and I am unleashed upon you. Get your heart right with god before it is too late.